Sunday, September 21, 2014

Me today: Just another day?

We were in the car, my girls and I. An average Sunday. We were driving to church and out of the blue my oldest daughter said, "my friends brother is bi-polar." It was the opportunity I have been praying about for years; the day I would tell my girls one of my secrets. I replied, "so am I." My daughters were a bit surprised but in a curious way. They immediately understood the difference between someone who takes their medication and someone who doesn't. You see, their Dad is bi-polar too. He has a duel diagnosis. Bi-polar runs on both sides of the family. The difference is, I don't fit into the Bi-polar box. I don't have extreme highs although I've had a couple over the years.I have more lows then highs and I don't drink and go on spending sprees. I have two children. I'm a single mom and I go to school full time. I work. I've owned a business. I'm currently helping a friend get her business of the ground. I'm as normal as we know normal to be.

I'm writing  a book. It's in the editing process. Thoughts haunt me that I shouldn't publish it
because I am not a professional writer. If I believed those lies that haunt me, then all of my Bi-polar friends would be missing out. They may feel alone, afraid of who they are or what they will become. You see, several of my Bi-polar friends are young. My book is for the lost, the believer who may judge and for those young friends.It's for Bi-polar believers and non believers as well. I'm openly sharing my journey. The good, the bad and the ugly. It's my journey and there is nothing to fear. I'm not afraid of being Bi-polar and I'm not afraid of you knowing my secrets. A friend once told me, "we are as sick as our secrets." I guess writing my story makes me one well person. `

No comments: