Thursday, October 13, 2011

Me. Today. A heart beat away from hope


"Hope deferred makes the heart sick, but a longing fulfilled is a tree of life” Proverbs 13:12

I don't really get this. Some say that when we put our hope in anything but the Lord then our hearts grow sick in the waiting....hmm

I grow sick in the waiting of what I think the Lord has promised or revealed in a revelation of knowledge to me; then I am humbled and I see that I can't lean on what I think the Lord has revealed to me. Time will tell if what I am "seeing" is from the Lord. I don't have to worry or even doubt if what I am waiting on is truth, fiction, fantasy or revelation from the Lord.

It really doesn't matter.

I have history with the Lord. He has gently lead me to truth when I just don't get it right.

He has confirmed for me when I am on the right path and other times has taken away things I thought I wanted much like a toddler grasping onto a big lollipop. The loving parent asks nicely, "may I please have the lollipop?" The toddler screams and fusses "NO!" So the loving parent simply takes it, let's the toddler scream and then all is peaceful.

I have screamed more then on one occasion to the Lord. I've told the Lord you just don't get it; I know totally imaturre.

Then He softly tells me that He understands my confusion. He doesn't expect me to always get it but I can trust that "Father knows best."

Today as I am a heartbeat away from hope....I trust in my heavenly Father that He will guide me to a place where I can grasp onto that hope in Him because hope in anything else will make my heart sick.

His plans are perfect.

I let you lead Lord. I'm lost.

I'm a heart beat away from that hope.

Then as I meditate on Proverbs 13:12 and ask the Lord to reveal His truth, it is as if I hear the angel's singing this song:

My hope is built on nothing less
Than Jesus' blood and righteousness
I dare not trust the sweetest frame
But wholly lean on Jesus' name

On Christ, the solid rock, I stand
All other ground is sinking sand
All other ground is sinking sand

When darkness veils His lovely face
I rest on His unchanging grace
In every high and stormy gale
My anchor holds within the veil

When He shall come with trumpet sound
O may I then in Him be found
Dressed in His righteousness alone
Faultless to stand before the throne

Lord, You are always good.

Period.

1 comment:

Jen Wags said...

Amen sister... One of my favorite songs. I always love the last verse of those old hymns. Whenever we sing them at church, I'm the one who throws out a little shout. Can you even imagine what it will feel like one day for us all. The Blessed Trumpet sound. Our Hope finally revealed.... Amazing!