Me. Today. It's been a long time

It's been a long time since I've looked at the 12 Steps to serenity.

photo credit:: creative commons: Billy Brown

Me. Today. wanting to learn how to have a healthy relationship.

You see, I was involved in a 12 Step program years ago but not as an addict. It was to gain perspective as to why I do what I do and how do I find peace in this process of healing? I had issues, that was a given but  I couldn't place my addiction. My addiction is a tough one because it is relationship.

I'm co-dependent.

We as Christ followers are called to have compassion, to carry each others burdens so I guess this all became confusing to me. How can a Christian be co-dependent? Most of us are so selfish.  Why can't we just give our all to someone no matter the cost? Jesus did, right?  One pastor I spoke with said , " Yeah, if only more Christians were co-dependent the church would reach more people."

I realize what an un- healthy and crazy statement that was.

We are called to compassion not co-dependency. We are not to try to play the part of Jesus or to even think by our thoughts and actions that we are the ones who can possibly heal someone or take all their burdens away.

My spiritual gifting does include empathy and compassion.

I just need to remember when to set my pride aside and to let Jesus do His thing. It's hard for me....I feel peoples pain so deeply and that calls me to action. But what does that look like in my life? Prayer? Yes. But is that it? I don't know. I will be attending a co-dependence anonymous group....details to come but I've began my journey and excited about it.

My second look at the 12 steps as someone who is co-dependent and looking for Jesus to heal.

Disclaimer: This is my second look so I promise I won't become to "crazy or loud" about my experience..this is the WWW you can choose not to read.

The 12 Steps

• Step 1 - We admitted we were powerless over our addiction - that our lives had become unmanageable 
•  Step 2 - Came to believe that a Power greater than ourselves could restore us to sanity 
• Step 3 - Made a decision to turn our will and our lives over to the care of God as we understood God 
•  Step 4 - Made a searching and fearless moral inventory of ourselves 
•  Step 5 - Admitted to God, to ourselves and to another human being the exact nature of our wrongs 
•  Step 6 - Were entirely ready to have God remove all these defects of character 
• Step 7 - Humbly asked God to remove our shortcomings 
• Step 8 - Made a list of all persons we had harmed, and became willing to make amends to them all 
• Step 9 - Made direct amends to such people wherever possible, except when to do so would injure them or others 
• Step 10 - Continued to take personal inventory and when we were wrong promptly admitted it 
• Step 11 - Sought through prayer and meditation to improve our conscious contact with God as we understood God, praying only for knowledge of God's will for us and the power to carry that out
• Step 12 - Having had a spiritual awakening as the result of these steps, we tried to carry this message to other addicts, and to practice these principles in all our affairs